Kidney Stones of Life
Those of us, who
haven’t personally experienced kidney stones, have heard of the painfully
perilous attempts to get rid of the merciless little buggers.
Basically a kidney stone is a monster
created by someone’s body, and presents itself by being where it shouldn’t be
while causing great annoyance to whomever and whatever it comes in contact with.
Well, my brother surmises
that kidney stones not only exist inside the body, but outside of it as well. In
fact he has given so much thought to it that he could present an entire seminar
on how to identify, deal with and survive them.
It all boils down to the
saying “Blessed are those who are pleasant to live with”. Yes, I’m talking about people who make your
life, and everyone else’s life, miserable.
Let me begin by saying, he attributes his
wisdom and understanding to years of observation, experience and in a few
instances, revelations obtained while listening to the radio on his way to and
from work. After my sister and I
inquired as to where he gained his knowledge, we exchanged stares of
aggravation, knowing we had paid for years of therapy to obtain the same
understanding. (I guess “his Mama didn’t
raise no fool” but then, we wonder what that makes us.)
Yes, some people are
like the Kidney Stones of life ….you see them coming and your body and mind scramble
to survival mode, fight or flight.
Flight usually wins as you do your best to avoid them. They’re everywhere; at work, class and family
reunions and yes, some of them even show up at church.
I
suppose it’s encouraging they come to church, but usually these people lack introspective
ability. They are (and I quote my
brother) the “Junior Holy Spirits” who, unlike you and other church members,
personally receive messages from God on how to run and organize the church and
everyone in it. They have been
personally ‘touched by angels’, ordained by God and blessed with the
discernment of the Holy Spirit to recognize the “slackers, sliders and
degenerates” of the congregation. It is
their mission, and theirs alone, to beat others into submission and repentance.
To avoid these stoney people at work, you
can duck into a closet, crawl under a desk, or escape to the restroom to spend
the next five minutes standing on the toilet seat in a locked stall. But, if they see you first you’re out of
luck and they follow you into your office to dump their negative energy and
stories of their unpleasant toxic lives.
There’s nothing quite like the boss who spends his workday trying to
create disharmony and dissention among his employees or the fellow worker who
must divulge every detail of their previous night’s diarrhea episode.
They “go through life sideways”, repeating
the same mistakes and wondering why their life isn’t different. It’s always about them. They show up
for gatherings, with the words ‘center of the universe’ stamped on their
foreheads. These people are the first
to take offense to something someone said in a conversation on which they were
eaves dropping. Usually the conversation
had nothing to do with them, but they assume it was about them because they
believe nobody likes them. They are
quick to express they didn’t want to attend the gathering anyway, and after a
display of drama laced with tears, anger and a few choice words, they stomp out
leaving a wake of traumatized people in their path.
In my brother’s words, “In the annals of
life there are those people who you see coming and you just want them to pass
through as quickly and painlessly as possible.”
